It is very much in vogue today to encourage men to openly express their feelings, but in practice few men do so.
Even in the face of tragic loss, many men in our society still feel the need to be self-contained, stoic and to express little or no outward emotion.
Synthesizing several grief theories, Jacobs (1993) presented a hypothesized set of responses to grief that expanded the stages: Recent studies (Bonanno, Wortman, et al 2002; 2004) have also highlighted several distinct recovery paths, and found that normal grief reactions persisted even eighteen months after the loss occurred.
Being the shoulder is a lot harder than he made it look.
You can help by offering a "safe place" for your friend to mourn. Around you, he doesn't have to be strong because you will offer support without judgment.
The grief experience naturally creates a turning inward and slowing down on the part of the mourner, a temporary self-focus that is vital to the ultimate healing process. Masculinity is equated with striving, moving and activity.
When a person is grieving, his or her capacity for giving to a relationship is far less than normal.
He or she is consumed with comprehending the loss experienced, and with coping with the multitude of feelings that accompany grief.